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waking from darkness
Antiques / bipolar / creative writing / depression / dogs / Essays / manic depression / mental health / mental illness / psychiatric / psychiatric writing / suicide / winter

waking from darkness

Sometimes I take my dog for a walk down a long dirt road with vistas on every side. There are barns painted teal. There are old, neglected chicken coops–the doors a faded red. Fields are everywhere, dotted with cows in the warm months, now barren but fecund soon enough. A small frozen puddle surrounded by … Continue reading

creative / despair / Good Writers and Good Books / homophobia / lesbians / rural / Short Fiction / winter


He would have preferred a job without the requisite chitchat, but after a year of shoveling snow, digging ditches, replacing rotted siding, and watching “Sanford & Son” reruns, Joe was relieved to get any job—even if it was working for the lesbians. The sign said “Colton Hardware Store,” but people called it the lesbian hardware … Continue reading

bipolar / despair / Essays / manic depression / mental health / mental illness / psychiatric / psychiatric writing

Too Much Information

During recess I would cling to the teacher, usually crying over something neither of us could identify. Fortunately, the teachers took pity on me, tolerating my need to be attached like a barnacle until recess ended and some irrelevant subject resumed. School was a distraction from the acute sense I had–even in Kindergarten–that life would … Continue reading



When things fall to pieces, everyone wants to believe friends can be called upon. There are times–pregnancy, cancer, divorce–where pain is time-limited and in these instances friends will step in, knowing their efforts have an endpoint: four or five visits, trips to the grocery store, casseroles, rides to chemo. And then, finally, there is a … Continue reading

bipolar / creative / despair / manic depression / mental health / mental illness / psychiatric / psychiatric writing

Irresistible Personal Ad

Middle-aged Jewish female with virulent bipolar disorder seeks lover–preferably female. Kindness, intelligence, financial generosity put you at the top of the list. What I offer: hot sex, at least for a while; a mind that, when operating correctly, delivers reliable first-class entertainment; humor and despair in equal measure; tears–joyful, sad, and others of unknown origin; … Continue reading